Self-actualization

I wasn’t too excited to spend my whole winter break here in Washington. I knew I was going to be missing out on a lot of stuff like hanging out with my close friends and attending special and important events. Yet, being a firm believer in that things happen for a reason, maybe my stay here was meant to happen… for a reason.

Orange County/LA, a fast pace city where it is rare for neighbors to befriend each other; whereas Kennewick, a small town where EVERYONE knows EVERYTHING about everyone; coming from a place also known as the Sunny Southern California with the perfect weather as to this town that never stops snowing during winter time, it was clear to me that things were different. Every family party and social gathering I attended here was elegant and at times formal. It was a definite change in lifestyle. I have 6 doctors in the family (my sister becoming the 7th soon) and they all reside here. I see how they live their successful yet simple lives and each and every one of them advise me on how to reach my future goal in becoming an attorney. Through them, I met an attorney who told me about his law school experience which ultimately encouraged me for a greater level. My time here is nothing but motivational. I would love to live a successful life like them and also carry the prestige they carry. I know it’s going to take a lot of sacrifice and discipline to get there – although I believe it’ll all be worth it in the long run.

So maybe my “unfortunate” stay here was for the good!

“You never know what’s coming”

(I am going to “somewhat” talk about the movie, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - which is now alongside my all-time favorites!)

The right response to loss, according to the film, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is acceptance rather than denial. Mike, the tugboat captain, says, “You can be as mad as a dog at the ways things went, you can swear and curse the fates, but when it comes to the end, you have to let go.”

Benjamin’s mother always told him, “You never know what’s coming.” Given the unpredictability of his life, he learns to appreciate life as a series of valuable moments, each to be cherished. Because he was not expected to live long, Benjamin grew up with the expectation that each day might be his last and therefore saw each day as a gift. Though he lived his life backwards, important moments—like his first steps, his first kiss and the birth of his first child—are no less special and meaningful. 

By observing The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, the film helped me further appreciate life as it is: a series of precious moments—often unexpected, sometimes sorrowful and occasionally nearly perfect—which are fleeting, but are also gifts to be cherished.

P.S. If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.

Hunger. Motivation. Finals!

I just finished my last final today and damn am I drained! For the past five days, I have probably only had eight hours of sleep… total. The last two nights were complete all-nighters and I just know my body is fucked up. I don’t think I have ever studied and crammed so much in such a condensed amount of time. Although it was very unhealthy to put my body through all that, I feel somewhat accomplished. Somehow I stuck through it and kept at it. One thing that I’ve learned throughout life is that everything that you really want is depended on how bad you want it – especially when it gets rough. I think you can compare it to just about anything/situation. But what I believe is even harder than the path of reaching your goal, is actually obtaining it. It is easy to get too comfortable. Being too comfortable can cause you to let up and slip (it’s seen constantly in sports). So the question here is, how do you stay hungry?

 

P.S. If it were easy, everyone would do it. And would you still want to be a part of it then?

The Importance of a Best Friend

How do you tell someone they’re gorgeous without sounding corny? How do you say hello to a stranger without giving the wrong impression? How do you express thanks to someone when saying “thank you” doesn’t even come close to justifying your appreciation? How do you express what and how you feel about a someone you care for?

When I am down and need assistance the most, the simple “cheer-ups” and words of encouragement really means a lot. Although I don’t show how much I appreciate such kind words, little do they know how much it means to me. Best friends means different things to different people. Some insist that you can have only one best friend, while others assert that they have best friends for different aspects of their personalities. Whatever the precise definition, my best friend is the person who gets me. They understand who I am and what I am saying. Through experience, I also believe that distance cannot separate best friends. You will always feel a kinship with them, and be able to instantly continue the friendship even after not talking for many years. 

So then again, I repeat, how can you express what and how you feel about a someone you care for?

Simple answer: anyway you want. But for me, I’ll say I love you.

I love you Best Friend.

Ready or Not…

Doesn’t matter if you’re ready or not. Sometimes you just have to jump.

Over the past summer I went skydiving with a couple of friends and two of my cousins at Lake Elsinore. I’ve always wanted to go skydiving since it seemed like the perfect adrenaline rush but never really thought I’d actually go through with it. Since the day started, I was extremely nervous and anxious. And prior to getting on the plane I went pee at least five times – and that’s underestimating it. Anyway, I had my mind set on being one of the last to jump (since that was the original plan). And unfortunately for me, I ended up being the last to board the plane which meant I had to jump first. As we took off in the air, my heart was pounding. Nonetheless, I am scared of heights and the fact that I was right in front of the open-aired door did not help at all. I thought to myself the normal “what-ifs” like what if the parachute doesn’t work and I die? All these crazy thoughts came across me. As we reached 12,000 ft. it was time. My instructor counted down 3..2..1.. When he was at 2, it didn’t matter if I was ready or not, I just knew it was no holding back now and that I absolutely had to jump. I jumped.

The first three to five seconds were the most terrifying three to five seconds of my life. I really felt as if death was not too far. But afterwards, my feelings changed. I felt on top of the world and invincible. The feeling of letting go of everything and just being free, words cannot explain. I felt all kinds of extreme emotions. l felt so fragile and helpless and at the same time so powerful and invincible.

How Tennis Taught Me Life Lessons

I could hardly breathe. Both my left leg and stomach were cramping continuously. It felt as if my whole body was disintegrating from dehydration and distress. There was nowhere to hide from the intense, blistering sun that did nothing but increase the rate of the salty beads of sweat dripping off my face. As I walked toward the baseline I could spot the roaring crowd and the anxious cameramen watching me from the corner of my eye. My tennis team and I were the former 2004 CIF champions and had all the confidence in the world to win again. I did not hear anything but the sound of my ball bouncing, as if in slow motion. And with a sudden movement, I looked into my opponent’s eyes and served the ball to begin the deciding tiebreaker. At the spur of the moment I did not know anything; I did not feel anything; and I was not aware of anything except the fact that it was the 2005 California Interscholastic Federation (CIF) Division II Tennis Championship. And, that we absolutely had to win.  As the game that day progressed, I felt the CIF title slipping further and further away from my grasp. We had lost. Suddenly, my ego didn’t feel so big, and the burning sensation was no longer from the sun, but from my embarrassment. I regretted being unprepared and overconfident. However, losing the 2005 CIF championship match made me proud due to the fact it made me realize that with preparation, humbleness, and determination, I can achieve anything.

After two years, I finally played tennis again at the UCLA courts. There was also a little boy playing tennis on another court which really brought flashbacks to the story of my life.

When I was seven years old my dad put my sister and me into tennis. From then up until my last year of high school, tennis was my life – literally. I practiced five days a week for three hours a day. Growing up, I had tennis tournaments almost every weekend. I couldn’t go out Friday nights prior to my matches on Saturday, because if I were to lose my dad would blame it on me going out – and that was always terrifying. I’ve gone through many wins and losses and emotions playing tennis as a child. Basically, tennis was the most stressful thing to me especially when it felt like a job and a duty, rather than something of fun. As I got older into my high school years, I played varsity freshman to senior year winning many awards and of course, the Division II CIF Championships (I hate to brag but my ring still looks nice -_-). Unfortunately, I became rebellious and refused to continue tennis due to the fact I was just burnt out, drained and just plain over it.

My dad once told me that when I am older, I will realize why he put me into tennis. I now know why. Not to be a professional tennis player, although that would be nice; not to get a full ride scholarship, although that too would also be nice; but, for some other fundamentally important things to life. The stress I’ve encountered really did bring some good. Tennis taught me life lessons like how to handle pressure, be competitive, and obtain mental toughness.

The same strength of preparation, determination, and humbleness that has helped me reach my past goals, both personally and academically, will help me attain my future goals and become an asset to my future challenges.

The Poet in you

I believe everyone is a poet!

k that’s it for now..back to “studying”

Purpose

Approximately 3 weeks ago, I injured my left foot and was almost sure I had a hairline fracture at minimum. I was to afraid to get it checked out due to the fact I broke my arm 4 years ago and did not want to go through the same hassle of possibly having a stupid cast and having to walk 2+ miles a day on campus. FUCK THAT SHIT. However, last night my friend had told me that he had also injured his foot about a month ago and recently checked it out finding out his foot was permanently damaged unless he was to undergo surgery. Therefore, I went to the Arthur Ashe Student Health Center here at UCLA earlier today to have my foot checked…

I had a little trouble understanding my doctor due to the fact his speech was impaired. I thought he was mentally challenged and wondered how he became a doctor with medical school and all. While he was on the computer, I noticed his fingers crumpled and stiff having trouble typing on the keyboard. He was probably the nicest doctor that I encountered with over there. I went through the whole process of X-raying and what not. Anxiously waiting, the doctor had finally returned to inform me that my foot had not been broken and that it was only badly bruised eventually healing in 8 weeks. I had the biggest smile on my face. Then, as I was on my way out of the health center, the nurse said to me, “He’s a nice guy isn’t he?” I replied with a simple “Yes, he was.” She then said, “After medical school, he had a stroke and was pretty much supposed to die, yet he survived and his speech was impaired so you just have to listen to him carefully.” After I was notified of that, I was just thinking to myself how maybe he survived because God had a grand design for him and a purpose.

People are often caught up with whatever keeps them busy – whether it be school, work, sports, etc. But just take a second or two to step out of your realm, step out of the person you’ve been, and just think…There must be something bigger and better than just what’s in front of me. All these “things” are just domains that are created by society. What if I create rules and regulations that are created by ME instead of society? What is real? What can be perceived as something intangible? I’m sure I have a purpose here in life that requires thinking outside the box. What’s your purpose?

Attitude

Each person is living their life second by second, day by day, seeking adventures and limitless wonders of what may come. It is important to get in touch with people’s thoughts and emotions since everyone has something to offer. In a blink of an eye, our lives will pass us by, and we will reminisce the journey that has brought us here. Time is never-ending. I am Chris, but I am not the same Chris as I was five seconds ago. The point is, life moves on…will you continue to accept the inevitable change? How will you mold unwanted obstacles and undesirable failures that come your way? I can give you one tip of advice – having the right attitude.

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company…a church… a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for the day. We cannot change our past… we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude… I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you… we are in charge of our Attitudes.